Real Answers to Life’s Questions
This month’s question comes in the form of a question that is often posed to the widow while she is still seeing to get beyond the death of her husband: IT HAS BEEN 9 MONTHS SINCE YOUR HUSBAND DIED. DON’T YOU THINK YOU SHOULD BE OVER IT?
I would answer the proposed question with a question, “Why should I get over it?” As we search the Scriptures, where do we ever see a person “getting over” the death of someone who had impacted his/her life? The fact that we still remember the patriarchs tell us that we never get over the death of one who has been a part of our lives. The fact that we still quote Moses, Naomi and Ruth (both widows), David, Solomon, Isaiah, Priscilla, and the list goes on, tells us “the dead still speak.” If the dead still speak then we have not gotten over them. And we shouldn’t.
To “get over” memories that have been a part of our lives for years is an impossibility. We must always remember. However, while cherishing the old memories we must also add new memories. To not add new memories is to stand still, and God has not called us to stand still. He has called us to daily serve Him and others. The command is to “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your strength.’ (31) The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” Mark 12:30-34
Jesus taught us to pray, “Thy kingdom come Thy will be done in/on earth as it is in Heaven.” How does His kingdom come to earth? Through us – you and me. That means we remember the past yet at the same time are adding a “new past” because each new day as He “gives us the daily bread,” we serve Him. When we serve Him our service should add remembrances that will remain with us forever. These remembrances should not paralyze us but give us a fresh motivation to go on.
Trust these words of the wise old preacher: “The memory of the righteous will be a blessing, but the name of the wicked will rot.” If the memories are pleasant, never get over them; just remember to add new ones. This way your past will be as fresh as the present.
The above was written by Dotti’s pastor of 27 years from up north. Rev. Dr. J. Bruce Sofia
P.S. ~ Dotti just emailed me this piece and it came at a good time for me as I just had a big crying meltdown, missing my husband so much. I just love how God sends things to us right when we need them. Our God is an awesome God.